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Zovem se Svetlost / My name is Light

Nekada davno postojao je jedan čovek, putovao je svetom i delio je ljudima svoj dar. Išao je od grada do grada, od mesta do mesta, davao je najbolje od sebe svakom čoveku koga je sreo. Ljudi su mu se ili zahvaljivali i osmehivali ili su ostajali zbunjeni. Neki su se čak i ljutili i terali ga od sebe. Ipak, svuda kuda je prošao ostavio je trag. Sve ljude koje je dotakao promenio je. Posle njega ništa više nije bilo isto. Taj čovek se zvao Svetlost, a njegov dar je bila svesnost. Osvetljavao je najmračnija mesta u ljudima ostavljajući svakome svoj dar. Znate šta je zanimljivo kod darova? Da li će ga neko prihvatiti i šta će uraditi sa njim ne zavisi od onoga ko daruje, već od onoga ko taj dar prima. Mnogi su darovi ostali neotvoreni i mnogi ljudi su izabrali da i pored svetla, žive u mraku.

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Once upon a time, there was one man who traveled the world and shared his gift with people. He went from city to city, from place to place, he gave the best of him to every man he met. People either thanked him and smiled or remained confused. Some even got angry and pushed him away. However, he left a mark everywhere he went. He changed all the people he touched. After him, nothing was the same. That man was called Light, and his gift was consciousness. He illuminated the darkest places in people, leaving everyone his gift. You know what’s interesting about gifts? Whether someone will accept it and what they will do with it does not depend on the one who gives, but on the one who receives that gift. Many gifts remained unopened and many people chose to live in the dark despite the light.

Tijana Stupljanin

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Na početku beše reč / At the beginning of everything there was a word

Da li si ikada, kada se prazna stranica otvori pred tvojim očima, osetio snažan nalet energije? To je bio prvi trenutak kada sam stvarno osetila i pomislila – možda ti jesi pisac.

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Have you ever felt a rush of energy when a blank page unfolds in front of you?  That was the first time I truly felt and thought to myself – maybe you are a writer.

Gorela je sveća u noći bez mesečine. U naletu poslednjih kontrakcija uz vrisak moje majke začuo se i moj plač. Možda mi je baš ta noć bez zvezda i meseca odredila sudbinu – tragala sam za svetlošću. Živela sam u iluzijama, u polusnu. Umrla sam kada je nestalo ljubavi u mome srcu.

Volela sam vruć vetar na licu, miris bagremovog cveta, golicanje trave dok trčimo po livadi bosi, vreli pesak na koži, šum talasa, mesečinu u kosi, dete u naručju, sitne prstiće, nemirne i meke, osmeh dečji kad me probudi… ali više od svega tvoj zagrljaj u noći…

Sada znam – zauvek ću živeti! Ljubavlju kojom sam gledala životu u oči, srcem koje je volelo grčeći se od boli, snagom duše koja je pogasila sva svetla od želje da se ponovo rodi u sjaju koji će goreti poput zvezde sa severa obasjavajući puteve ka ljubavi i slobodi.

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A candle was burning on a moonless night. In the rush of the last contractions, along with my mother’s scream, my cry was also heard. Maybe that night without stars and the moon determined my destiny – I was looking for light. I lived in the illusions, in a half-sleep. I died when the love in my heart disappeared.

I loved the hot wind on my face, the smell of acacia flowers, tickling of the grass as we run across the meadow barefoot, hot sand on my skin, the sound of waves, the moonlight in my hair, a child in my arms, little fingers, restless and soft, a child’s smile when it wakes me… but more than anything your hug in the night …

Now I know – I will live forever! The love with which I looked life in the eye, the heart that loved while twisting in pain, the strength of the soul that extinguished all the lights of the desire to be born again in the radiance that will burn like a star from the north illuminating the paths to love and freedom.

Tijana Stupljanin

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Teško je? / It is hard?

Na ovim našim južno balkanskim prostorima čini mi se da se rađamo sa tim – Teško je. Vraća nam se kao eho tokom celog života. Kako zakoračimo, hoćemo da se popnemo na vrh brda – još si mali, ne možeš ti to, teško je. Kada progovorimo, ja ću promeniti svet – nema šanse, to je teško, ti nisi dovoljno dobar. Ja hoću da živim drugačije – ne može, to niko ne radi, biće teško.

Sva moja ja hoću, ja želim, ja mogu, ja znam, odjeknuli su u ovoj stvarnosti kao ti ne smeš, ti sanjaš, ti ne možeš, ti ne znaš, koje naša podsvest čuje kao ti ne valjaš, ti nisi dovoljno dobar, tebi nešto fali. Onda vidiš i čuješ kako je neko uspeo to preteško, nemoguće i nenormalno da uradi i da ostane živ. I opet ćete čuti, to je tamo neki izuzetak, on je poseban, to može samo tamo u toj nekoj zemlji, to može samo tamo neko ko ima tamo nešto. Ovde je i dalje teško, ovde se i dalje to ne radi.

Ovde je toliko teško da čak i kad nekome nešto ide lako u životu, to je zato što su mu roditelji bogati, to je zato što je odrastao u tom kraju, to je zato što ima vezu, to je zato što ima dobre gene, to je viša sila i nema tu nikakve zasluge tog čoveka koji živi lepo i lako.

Ovde se vrlo lako od nečega dobrog, lepog i jednostavnog dođe do pečata težine, jer ako ti je sve lepo i lako, a većini je ružno i teško, štrčiš, ne uklapaš se. Malo je onih koji će u nečijem uspehu prepoznati inspiraciju i podstrek da i sami uspeju. Jer za uspeh je potrebno učenje, promena mišljenja, promena ponašanja, spremnost da se ne uspe iz prve, da se pokuša ponovo, da se uradi nešto drugačije… Mislim da je Ajnštajn rekao – Ne možete raditi uvek isto i očekivati drugačiji rezultat. Međutim, svaka promena je teška, mnogo je lakše kukati i zavideti.

Mislim da svi znaju basnu o lisici i grožđu, pa sve što nam nije na dohvat ruke, lako okarakterišemo kao „kiselo“. Međutim, niti je svo grožđe kiselo, niti je nedostižno, ali i nije sve za svakoga. Ako budemo počeli da slušamo želje svoje duše i da pratimo putokaze svoga srca, biće nam sigurno lakše, čak i kada naiđu oni stvarno teški trenuci u životu, plus ćemo uštedeti mnogo energije ne jureći tuđe želje.

Znate kako se nebo otvara kada avion uzleti i kakve god da su vremenske prilike dole pri zemlji, kada se popnete na određenu visinu (iznad oblaka) pojavi se sunce i sve se razbistri. Verujem da je tako i u životu, kada se uzdignemo barem malo iznad pukog preživljavanja tela i zemaljskog (prizemnog) promišljanja života, počinju da se naziru novi horizonti i beskrajne mogućnosti.

Pratite sebe i svoje osećaje, nešto što je dobro za vas će se pokazati kao lakoća, a za nekoga ista ta stvar može dati teskobu u telu. Zato kada vam sledeći put neko za vašu želju, nadu ili cilj, kaže da je to teško, zapitajte se da li je to vaša istina ili možda njegova? I znajte da šta god da je vaša želja, bar jedna osoba na svetu je uspela da ostvari baš to, a ako je ona uspela šta vas sprečava?

Idite za svetlošću, lakoćom i radošću!

In these parts of our southern Balkans, it seems to me that we are born with that – It is difficult. It comes back to us as an echo throughout life. As we make our first steps, we want to climb to the top of the hill – you are still small, you can’t do that, it’s hard. When we start to talk, I will change the world – no way, it’s hard, you’re not good enough. I want to live differently – it can’t happen, nobody does that, it will be difficult.

All of mine I want, I wish, I can, I know, resonated in this reality like: you can’t, you dream, you won’t, you don’t know, which our subconscious mind hears like you are bad, you’re not good enough, you are defected. Then you see and hear how someone managed to do that too hard, impossible and abnormal thing and stay alive. And you will hear again, it is an exception, he is special, it can only be done there in that country, it can only be done there by someone who has that something. It is still difficult here; it still cannot be done here.

It’s so hard here that even when something goes easy for someone in life, it’s because his parents are rich, it’s because he grew up in that area, it’s because he has a connection, it’s because he has good genes, it is a higher power and there is no merit in it of that man who lives beautifully and easily.

Here, it is very easy to get the stamp of weight on something good, beautiful and simple, because if everything is nice and easy for you, and most of others live badly and difficult, you stick out, you don’t fit. There are few who will recognize inspiration and encouragement in someone’s success to succeed on their own. Because success requires learning, a change of opinion, a change of behavior, a willingness to fail at first, to try again, to do something different … I think Einstein said – You can’t always do the same thing and expect a different result. However, every change is difficult, it is much easier to whine and envy.

I think everyone knows the fable about the fox and the grapes, so everything that is not at our fingertips can easily be characterized as “sour”. However, neither all grapes are sour, nor is it unattainable, but not everything is for everyone. If we start listening to the wishes of our soul and following the directions of our heart, it will surely be easier for us, even when those really difficult moments in life come, plus we will save a lot of energy without chasing other people’s wishes.

You know how the sky opens when the plane takes off and whatever the weather is down at the surface of the earth, when you climb to a certain height (above the clouds) the sun appears and everything clears up. I believe that this is also the case in life, when we rise at least a little above the mere survival of the body and the earthly (ground) thinking of life, new horizons and endless possibilities begin to emerge.

Be aware of yourself and your feelings, something that is good for you will prove to be easy, and for someone the same thing can give anxiety in the body. So the next time someone tells you that your wish, hope or goal is difficult, ask yourself if it is your truth or maybe his? And know that whatever your wish is, at least one person in the world has managed to achieve just that, and if she has succeeded, what is stopping you?

For light, ease and joy!

Tijana Stupljanin

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Život za život – sve za dete / Life for life – everything for a child

Prvih 5 godina pokušavamo da ih skinemo sa sebe, onda sledećih pet godina pokušavamo ponovo da ih prikačimo za sebe, pa narednih pet godina oni pokušavaju da nas otkače od sebe, pa se onda mi trudimo da se ponovo prikačimo za njih i tako u nedogled… Odnos roditelja i dece i odnos dece i roditelja, ostaje večita misterija života.😊

Gledala sam danas animirani film o Herkulu, čuvenom heroju iz Grčke mitologije. U jednom trenutku otac, vrhovni Bog Zevs, kaže svom sinu da mora postati heroj kako bi ponovo postao Bog, a za to je potrebno da učini istinski herojsko delo. I tako se Herkul odlučio da vežba i trenira svakodnevno, kako bi postao pravi heroj. Međutim, iako je postao heroj i stekao slavu u narodu, to nije bilo dovoljno. I na kraju, ključni herojski čin koji ga je vratio među Bogove je bilo davanje svog života u zamenu za život žene koju voli.

To me je navelo na razmišljanje o simbolici te ideje, koja se javlja u mnogim pričama, život za život, žrtvovanje iz ljubavi… Podsetilo me je na roditeljstvo. Na neki način mi dajemo naš život kakav poznajemo do trenutka dok ne postanemo roditelji, za novi život. Neki roditelji i bukvalno žrtvuju sebe ne bi li njihova deca živela bolje, lepše, više od njih… Ne shvatamo svi žrtvu na isti način, ali odricanje od mnogo stvari je sastavni deo roditeljstva.

Ne mislim da deca treba da dobiju sve što požele i ne postoji univerzalni pristup vaspitanju koji možete da reprodukujete na dete i samo ubirete plodove. Pa sa koliko se izazova svako od nas susreo u svom životu, svi smo različiti i živimo svoj život najbolje što umemo, često posustajemo, pa se ponovo podižemo i idemo dalje. Učimo, menjamo se, nekada se godinama vrtimo u krug ili tapkamo u mestu, a onda pored svega toga dobijemo odgovornost za još jedan, dva, tri… života. Kako neko ko nije sam naučio da bude srećan, da voli, da živo ispunjenim životom, da sa lakoćom prevazilazi izazove koji su svakodnevni, a nekada i vrlo kompleksni, kako neko ko nema samopouzdanja može da nauči dete da bude srećno i živi svoj život punog potencijala sa lakoćom i radošću?

Ipak, kao što smo mi svi unikatni na svoj način, tako je i svako dete svoje. Neku decu treba vaspitavati, a neku samo negovati. Ne moramo biti savršeni, ali moramo biti svoji i iskreni. Deca znaju mnogo više nego što mislimo, jer su njihove misli čiste i osećanja duboka. Nekada pomislim da ne treba da ih učimo da se prilagođavaju ovom svetu, već da grade svoj.

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You become a parent and realize that you have permanently exchanged one life for another, and that, whether you like it or not, you have a huge responsibility and influence on a life that is not yours, and that it is up to you to teach someone about life, no matter how much you have mastered it yourself.

For the first 5 years we try to take them off ourselves, then for the next five years we try to attach them to ourselves again, then for the next five years they try to detach us from themselves, and then we try to attach to them again and so on indefinitely… The relationship between parents and children and the relationship between children and parents remains an eternal mystery of life.

Today I watched an animated film about Hercules, a famous hero from Greek mythology. At one point, the father, the supreme God Zeus, tells his son that he must become a real hero in order to become God again, and for that he needs to do a truly heroic deed. And so Hercules decided to practice and train every day, in order to become a real hero. However, although he became a hero and gained fame among the people, that was not enough. And finally, the key heroic act that brought him back among the Gods was giving his life in exchange for the life of the woman he loves.

That made me think about the symbolism of that idea, which appears in many stories, life for life, sacrifice out of love … It reminded me of parenthood. In a way we give our life as we know it until the moment we become parents, for a new life. Some parents literally sacrifice themselves in order for their children to live better, more beautiful, more than them … We do not all understand sacrifice in the same way, but giving up many things is an integral part of parenthood.

I don’t think that children should get everything they want and there is no universal approach to upbringing that you can reproduce to a child and just reap the rewards. Well, how many challenges did each of us face in our lives, we are all different and we live our lives the best we can, we often fall, so we get up again and move on. We learn, we change, sometimes for years go around in a circle or tap in one place, and then, in addition to all that, we get responsibility for another one, two, three… lives. How someone who has not learned to be happy, to love, to live a full life, to easily overcome challenges that occur daily, and are sometimes very complex, how someone who does not have self-confidence can teach a child to be happy and live his life in a full potential with ease and joy?

However, just as we are all unique in our own way, so is every child. Some children need to be brought up, and some just need to be nurtured. We don’t have to be perfect, but we do have to be our own and honest. Children know much more than we think, because their thoughts are pure and their feelings are deep. Sometimes I think that we should not teach them to adapt to this world, but to build their own.

Tijana Stupljanin

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Čarolija / Magic

From silence to silence. The light is emerging from the blue clouds. From my cozy nights into a doubt-colored dawn. From the depths of my being, through the gloaming darkness and fear, rises a new, blossomed, flaming, playful and singing enchantress woman, half goddess – half warrior, sometimes a fairy, or a witch.

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Man vs. Nature / Čovek protiv prirode

Since the beginning of time, the man had to face the forces of nature to ensure his own survival. The nature has been observed as hostile, the man had to fight with his body and mind to concur the nature and make it his servant. However, more than once, the nature has demonstrated how powerful and wild it can truly be and the man, with all his science and technology and progress, stood no chance. Nevertheless, the mankind survived, there are more people in the world today than ever before.

If you start to think about this, it becomes clear, there is no man vs. nature, the nature is within a man, and the man is within the nature, we do not exist apart from it. If we fight the nature within, then we fight against our own bodies, our own instincts, senses… And if we fight the nature around us, we inevitably lose, because we are just a small piece of it. How about if we stop fighting and start listening, begin working together, cooperating, learn from it as much as we can and then co-create, play with it. This is the abundant planet, there is enough food, clothes and homes for each and every one of us. Nature is greater than all of us together, she gave a birth to everything that exists, we call it a Mother for a reason. She gave us everything she had so that we would live a happy life, as every mother would, and she did it with love.

And how do you treat your mother? Do you show her respect? Are you thankful for her gifts? How do you show your love?

If you do not understand your nature, that is within you and all around you, then you cannot appreciate it and you wouldn’t know how to love yourself or the world around you. Even that’s o.k., mother is forgiving and compassionate, her own love is enough, but you better show her respect! Because the Earth will survive without us, but where would we be without the Earth?

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Od početka vremena čovek je morao da se suočava sa prirodnim silama kako bi obezbedio svoj opstanak. Na prirodu se gledalo kao na neprijatelja, čovek je morao da se bori i umom i telom kako bi je pokorio i potčinio je svojim potrebama. Međutim, više puta je priroda demonstrirala koliko moćna i neukrotiva zaista može biti i čovek, sa svim svojim naučnim dostignućima i tehnologijama i napretkom, nije imao nikakve šanse. Ipak, čovečanstvo je preživelo i danas ima više ljudi na svetu nego ikada pre.

Ako se zamislimo nad ovim, postaje jasno da čovek ne može protiv prirode, jer priroda je u čoveku i čovek je u prirodi, mi ne postojimo odvojeno od nje. Ako se opiremo prirodu u nama, onda se borimo sa našim telima, sopstvenim nagonima, čulima… A ukoliko se borimo sa prirodom oko nas, neminovno gubimo, jer smo mi samo mali njen deo. Kako bi bilo kada bismo prestali da se borimo a počeli da slušamo, da sarađujemo, da učimo od nje što više i onda da stvaramo zajedno, da se igramo. Ovo je planeta obilja, ima dovoljno hrane za sve, odeće i krova nad glavom za baš svakoga od nas. Priroda je veća od svih nas zajedno, ona je rodila sve što postoji, ne zovemo je uzalud Majka Priroda. Dala nam je sve što je imala kako bismo živeli srećno, baš kao prava majka, i to je uradila sa ljubavlju.

A kako se mi ponašamo prema svojoj majci? Da li joj ukazujemo poštovanje? Da li smo zahvalni na njenim darovima? Kako joj pokazujemo ljubav?

Ukoliko ne razumeš svoju prirodu, onu koja je u tebi i onu koja te okružuje, onda je nećeš ni ceniti i nećeš umeti da voliš ni sebe ni svet oko sebe. Čak je i to u redu, jer majka je puna saosećanja i opraštanja, njena sopstvena ljubav joj je dovoljna, ali bolje bi ti bilo da je poštuješ! Jer Zemlja će nastaviti da postoji i bez nas, a gde bismo mi bili bez nje?

Tijana

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Koliko vredim? / What is my worth?

Onoliko koliko volite sebe – tolika je vaša cena – i život poštuje tu cenu.

–  Miguel Ruiz, Moć Ljubavi

How much you love yourself – such is your price – and life respects that price.

– Miguel Ruiz, The Mastery of Love: A Practical Guide to the Art of Relationship –Toltec Wisdom Book

Da li znate priču o žabici koja je pobedila u trci i jedina stigla do cilja? (The Frogs’ Race by Dulce Rodrigues) Priča ide otprilike ovako: u šumi je bila organizovana trka, žabica koja uspe da se prva popne na visoki toranj je pobednik. Trka je počela, međutim publika je, umesto da bodri takmičare, poput nekog starog mrzovoljnog žapca, počela da dovikuje – žabe ne mogu da se penju, nikada nećete uspeti, spore ste, to je nemoguće, šta zamišljate ko ste i slična omalovažavanja. Polako su jedna po jedna žabica odustajale i napuštale trku. Na kraju je ostala samo jedna žabica koja se uopšte nije osvrtala već je hrabro išla napred. Kada se popela na vrh i stigla na cilj okrenula se i shvatila da je pobedila, bila je presrećna i zadovoljna, mada malo tužna što ni jedna druga žabica nije stigla na cilj. Svi su se pitali po čemu je posebna baš ta žabica, da bi shvatili da je ona gluva i da nije čula negativne povike i obeshrabrivanje iz publike, već je slušala samo svoj unutrašnji glas koji ju je konstantno bodrio!

Čovek je društveno biće, od kada se rodimo usmereni smo na druge ljude. Dete svet otkriva kroz svoj odnos sa majkom pre svega, pa onda i sa ocem, najbližom porodicom, zatim sa vršnjacima, učiteljima, nastavnicima, komšijama i svim ljudima koje u životu, makar i na kratko, sreće. Svi znamo iz sopstvenog iskustva koliko nam znači pohvala, razumevanje, neko da nas sasluša, neko da nas samo zagrli, neko ko nam je u bilo kojoj sferi autoritet da nam da potvrdu da smo nešto dobro uradili… A šta kada sve to izostane?

Da li nas je iko učio kako da budemo uvek svesni svoje vrednosti i kako da sebi budemo najveća podrška? Često se dogodi u životu da roditelji, koliko god dobri i dobronamerni bili, našem vaspitavanju prilaze iz sopstvenih ograničenja, negativnih iskustava, strahova, pa i iz neznanja. Sigurno ima i onih koji se rode sa neverovatnim samopouzdanjem i verom u sebe i sopstvenu veličinu, kao i onih koje roditelji, ili neki drugi autoritet, uspeju da zadoje ovim vrednostima, ali verujem da je za većinu nas bilo potrebno mnogo saplitanja, učenja, padanja i ustajanja dok nismo spoznali svoju istinsku vrednost i podesili svoj život prema njoj.

Slušala sam nedavno govor Arnolda Švarcenegera u kome je govorio o uspehu. Fasciniralo me je to što su njemu u uspehu u stvari pomogle baš one osobine koje su svi isticali kao njegove mane. I šta bi sa njim bilo da je umesto sebe poslušao sve te druge koji su mu govorili da neće uspeti zbog jakog austrijskog naglaska, zbog prevelikih mišića, neobičnog imena, itd., a on je od bolešljivog, mršavog dečaka iz siromašnog sela u Austriji postao jedan od najplaćenijih glumaca na svetu i guverner Los Anđelesa! On je imao veliku viziju svog života i naporno je radio da je ostvari, ali čini mi se od svega, da mu je najviše pomoglo to što nije slušao ljude koji su mu govorili da neće uspeti i davali mu, pri tom, vrlo realne razloge zašto neće uspeti! Jedino je bilo važno da on sebe vidi kao Mister Univerzuma, glavnog glumca, guvernera…

Toliko je uspešnih priča svuda oko nas i to najviše tamo gde ih najmanje očekujemo. Ljudi koji dožive povredu i doktori im kažu da više nikada neće hodati samostalno, a oni postanu trkači, gimnastičarka sa veštačkom nogom, milioneri koji su odrastali u bedi, ljudi koji dožive najveću tragediju, a onda tu svoju tragediju pretvore u nešto veće od života, ljude koji prežive nemoguće situacije i one koji urade neviđene stvari… Međutim, isto tako imate ljude kojima su doktori greškom rekli da će umreti za mesec dana i oni zaista umru, iako su u stvari bili zdravi, ili veoma talentovane ljude koji padnu u depresiju ili se okrenu porocima i nikada ne dostignu svoj puni potencijal.

Kada smo deca uče nas da slušamo druge. Ja sam prva koja deci skoro svakodnevno govori koliko je važno da slušaju svoje roditelje, ali ih takođe učim da su oni najbolje od nas dvoje i da imaju potencijal kada porastu da budu bolji i pametniji od nas. Isto tako ih učim da čuju svakoga, ali da uvek procene da li to što čuju od drugih korespondira sa njihovim unutrašnjim glasom. Problem nastaje kada mi zaboravimo svoju vrednost sa kojom dolazimo na ovaj svet i počnemo da se oslanjamo na ono što drugi ljude misle ili govore o nama. Možda će nas drugi i preceniti, ipak je veća verovatnoća da će nas podceniti, ali ni jedna od ove dve varijante neće nas usrećiti. Kao što istinsku sreću možemo jedino pronaći u sebi, duboki mir spoznati iznutra, tako i sopstvenu vrednost moramo osetiti u sebi i onda je podeliti sa svetom, a to ćemo uspeti ako se podsetimo svakodnevno ko smo, povezujući se sa sobom, vraćajući se suštini i osluškujući svoju dušu. Tehnika za to ima danas baš koliko hoćeš! Meni su najdraže: ples slobodnim stilom uz muziku koja me podiže, razgovor sa svojim odrazom u ogledalu, pevanje, crtanje ili slikanje, pisanje, yoga, šetnja, gledanje u prirodu…

Henri Ford je jedan od najuspešnijih ljudi ikada i znao je svoju vrednost, evo šta je on rekao o tome: “Mene ne brine šta drugi misle o meni, zato što znam svoju pravu vrednost. A milijarder sam postao zato što znam s novcem i umem da razlikujem prave vrednosti od lažnih.”

Na kraju, vredimo onoliko koliko smo zadovoljni sobom i koliko uživamo u životu. Ako se nekada dogodi da pokleknete pred životom i niste u stanju da volite sebe, pogledajte u oči onih koje volite i koji vole vas, oslušnite šta će vam reći, oni vide u nama svu našu lepotu i dobrotu i kada nismo u svom najboljem izdanju. Ljubav će nas podsetiti na najlepši mogući način na to ko smo i koliko smo dragoceni.

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Do you know the story of a frog who won the race and was the only one to reach the finish line? (The Frogs’ Race by Dulce Rodrigues) The story goes something like this: a race was organized in the woods, the frog that manages to climb the high tower first is the winner. The race started, but the audience, instead of cheering on the competitors, like an old grumpy frog, started shouting – frogs can’t climb, you will never succeed, you are slow, it is impossible, who do you imagine you are and similar insults. Slowly, one by one, the frogs gave up and left the race. In the end, there was only one frog left, which did not look back at all, but went forward bravely. When she climbed to the top and reached the finish line, she turned around and realized that she had won, she was overjoyed and satisfied, although a little sad that no other frog had reached the finish line. Everyone wondered what made that frog special, and they discovered that she was deaf and that she did not hear negative shouts and discouragement from the audience, but only listened to her inner voice, which constantly encouraged her!

Man is a social being; from the minute we are born we are focused on other people. The child discovers the world through his relationship with his mother first of all, and then with his father, the closest family, then with his peers, caregivers, teachers, neighbors and all the people he meets in life, even for a short time. We all know from our own experience how much praise and understanding means to us, someone to listen to us, someone to just hug us, someone who is our authority in any sphere to confirm that we have done something good… And what if all that is missing?

Has anyone taught us how to always be aware of our values ​​and how to be our greatest support? It often happens in life that parents, no matter how good and well-intention they are, approach our upbringing out of their own limitations, negative experiences, fears, and even out of ignorance. Sure, there are those who are born with incredible self-confidence and faith in themselves and their own greatness, as well as those whose parents, or some other authority, manage to instill these values in them, but I believe that most of us needed a lot of tripping, learning, falling and rising until we realized our true value and adjusted our lives to it.

I recently listened to a speech by Arnold Schwarzenegger in which he spoke about success. I was fascinated by the fact that the very qualities that everyone has pointed out as his shortcomings actually helped him in his success. And what would have happened to him if he had listened to all those others who told him that he would not succeed because of his strong Austrian accent, because of his oversized muscles, his unusual name, etc. Instead he has went from sickly, skinny boy from a poor village in Austria to one of the highest paid actors in the world and the governor of Los Angeles! He had a great vision of his life and worked hard to make it happen, but it seems to me that what helped him the most was that he did not listen to people who told him that he would not succeed and gave him, at the same time, very real reasons why it will not work! The only thing that mattered was that he saw himself as Mr. Universe, the main actor, the governor and fallowed that vision…

There are so many success stories all around us, mostly where we least expect them. People who get injured and doctors tell them that they will never walk on their own again, and they become runners, a gymnast with an artificial leg, millionaires who grew up in misery, people who experience the greatest tragedy, and then turn their tragedy into something bigger than life, people who survive impossible situations and those who do unseen things… However, you also have people who were mistakenly told by doctors that they would die in a month and they do die, even though they were actually healthy, or very talented people who fall into depression or turn to vices and never reach their full potential.

When we are children they teach us to listen to others. I am the first one who tells their children almost every day how important it is to listen to their parents, but I also teach them that they are the best of the two of us and that they have the potential when they grow up to be better and smarter than us. I also teach them to hear everyone, but to always assess whether what they hear from others corresponds to their inner voice. The problem arises when we forget our value with which we come to this world and begin to rely on what other people think or say about us. Maybe others will overestimate us, but they are more likely to underestimate us, however neither of these two variants will make us happy. Just as we can only find true happiness in ourselves, know deep peace from within, so we must feel our own value in ourselves and then share it with the world, and we will succeed if we remind ourselves every day who we are, connecting with ourselves, returning to the essence and listening to our soul. There is a plenty of techniques for that today, just as much as you want! My favorites are: freestyle dancing with music that lifts me up, talking to my reflection in the mirror, singing, drawing or painting, writing, yoga, walking (preferably in nature)…

Henry Ford is one of the most successful people ever and he knew his value, here’s what he said about it: “I don’t care what others think of me, because I know my true value. And I became a billionaire because I am knowledgeable with money and I can distinguish true values ​​from false ones.”

We are worth as much as we are satisfied with ourselves and as much as we enjoy life. If you ever happen to kneel before life and you are not able to love yourself, look into the eyes of your loved ones and those who love you, listen to what they will tell you, they see in us all our beauty and goodness even when we are not at our best. Love will remind us in the most beautiful way as possible of who we are and how precious we are.

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Život ili smrt / Life or death

Iz perspektive smrti sve ostalo izgleda kao čista lakrdija.

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From a perspective of a death, everything else is just a mockery.

– Horhe Luis Borhes

Bole me sva tvoja čekanja na prozoru

i gledanja na sat

I sva naša neviđanja, isto tako

Važno mi je samo da znaš,

volela sam te neizmerno i tada

kao i sad

I ni jedna razdaljina

ne može to da promeni,

pa ni ova smrt što je napravi

Čekam tebe sada ja

na prozorima moje duše

i nikada vrata ne zatvaram

Sećanja kad navrate,

vrate na kratko sve naše uspomene,

i tugom i srećom me nahrane,

znam da mi ih ti šalješ

na krilima vihora

iz daleka…

Iz daleka…

A ja ti pesmom pozdrave uzvraćam,

ime tvoje dozivam,

kao ti moje što si nekad


Ako ste ikada potpuno iskreno i beskrajno, detinje, voleli nekoga ko više nije među živima, znate da ljubav ne umire smrću tela. Ta ljubav ostaje sa nama i u nama, rekla bih sve do naše smrti, ali nekako slutim da ta ljubav ostaje utkana u našu dušu i živi sa njom doveka.

Srećan je ko ume da voli – kako je to lepo rekao Hese, samo nije to laka sreća! Kada zaista volite nekoga, kao da nemate izbora, volite i sve njegove mane isto koliko i vrline, i volite i kada vas boli neki njegov postupak, čak i kada se taj neko ružno ponese prema vama (ne mislim ovde na bilo koju vrstu zlostavljanja! Tu nema LJ od ljubavi i tačka!). Ljubav tada i zaboli, ali to nas boli naša ljubav koja nosi i veliku odgovornost, jer mi imamo priliku da kroz tu ljubav porastemo, prihvatajući nesavršenost onoga koga volimo, prihvatamo i svoje slabosti i podižemo se na jedan novi nivo u odnosima sa svim ljudima koji su u našim životima. Ako uspemo da prođemo kroz tu bol, a zadržimo ljubav, uradili smo veliku stvar, jer smo tada dali krila toj ljubavi i biću koje volimo, da poleti do visina svoje duše.

Nema boljeg leka od razumevanja i praštanja, a bez ljubavi nema ničega. Smrt ne boli, smrt samo opominje, podučava, podseća da smo sada u ovom trenutku još živi i da imamo mogućnost da biramo kako ćemo živeti. Kada pogledam šta ljudi na samrti kažu o životu, zaključujem, ono što moja duša već zna, da život bez ljubavi prema sebi i ljubavi prema ljudima oko sebe, nema mnogo smisla. Ne morate imati muža ili decu, da biste živeli smisleno, volite to što imate, budite dobri prema sebi, svojim roditeljima, sestrama, braći, prijateljima, ako nemate ni njih, volite svoje komšije, svoje ljubimce, ljude koje srećete na ulici, prodavačice, ako vam je i to teško, volite svoja dela, svoj posao, uložite svu svoju ljubav u nešto što će se utkati u nečiju dušu i nastaviti da živi i kad vas više ne bude.

Za mene je samo ljubav smisao života, a koliko ćemo ljubavi imati u životu zavisi samo od nas. Da, ja sam srećna jer umem da volim, ali da mi je uvek lako, nije, nekada zaboravim da dam sebi malo te podrške i ljubavi, nekada uradim nešto što me razočara i zaboli, nekada čekam da mi je neko drugi pruži, samo to ne funkcioniše tako. Ako ne volimo sebe onom beskrajnom, detinjom ljubavlju sa početka priče, nećemo prepoznati ili nećemo ceniti ni ljubav koju nam drugi daju. I još nešto, ako ne negujemo ljubav prema sebi, nećemo imati dovoljno ljubavi kojom ćemo razumeti, podržavati i praštati onima koji našoj ljubavi/životu daju smisao.

P.S. Volim te

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All yours waiting at the window hurts me,
looking at the clock too
And all the time we didn’t spent together, as well
It is important to me for you to know just this,
I loved you indefinitely then
as I do now
And there is no distance
that can change this,
not even the one death had made
Now I wait for you
at the windows of my soul
and I never close the door
When memories burst in,
bringing back for a moment all our reminiscences,
filling me with sadness and with happiness,
I know you are sending them my way
on the whirlwind’s wings
from far away…
From far away…
And I salute you in return with this song,
and I shout out your name,
as you once shouted mine


If you had ever completely true and infinitely, childlike, loved someone who is no longer among living, you know that love does not die with the body. That love stays with us and within us until we die, I would say, but somehow I sense that this love stays woven into our soul and lives with it forever.

Happy is the one who can love – as beautifully said by Hesse, however, it is not easy luck! When you really love someone, as if you don’t have a choice, you love all his downsides as much as his virtues and you love him even if you are hurt by some of his actions, even when that someone has mistreated you (just to be clear, I do not talk here about any kind of abuse! Where there is abuse, there is no mention of love, period!). When that happens, love hurts, but what hurts is our own love that carries a big responsibility, because we have the opportunity to grow through this love, by accepting the imperfections of our loved one, we also accept our own weaknesses and we rise up to a new level of relationship with all the people in our lives. If we manage to pass through that pain and keep the love, we have done a great thing, because then we gave wings to that love and to that someone we love, so he can fly to the heights of his soul.

There is no better remedy than understanding and forgiving, and without love, there is nothing. Death does not hurt, death warns, teaches, reminds that we are now, at this moment still alive and that we have the possibility to choose how we are going to live. When I see what people at their deathbed are saying about life, I conclude – what my soul already knows, that life without love for the self and for the people around, has very little sense. You don’t have to have a husband or kids to have a meaningful life, you can love what you have, be good to yourself, your parents, sisters, brothers, friends, and if you don’t have any of those people, love your neighbors, your pets, people you meet on the street, a saleswoman, if that’s too hard for you, love your deeds, your work, invest all your love in something that will touch someone’s soul and continue to live even when you are gone.

To me, love is the only purpose of life, and how much love will we have in life depends solely on us. Yes, I am happy because I know how to love, however it does not come always easy, sometimes I forget to give to myself a bit of that support and love, sometimes I do something that disappoints and hurts me, at times I wait for someone to give me that love, only it doesn’t work that way. If we don’t love ourselves with that infinite, childlike love from the beginning of this story, we will never recognize or appreciate the love somebody else is giving to us. And one more thing, if we don’t cherish self-love, we will not have enough love to understand, support and forgive to those who give our love/life a purpose.

P.S. I love you

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Ljubav/Love

Ima dana kada se probudim uzemljena, puna snage, svesna života u meni i oko mene. Tada vidim stvari izoštrenije, kao da se materija razliva i dopušta suštini da se izrazi. Postanem svesnija malih stvari koje čine život, koje znače mnogo više nego što smo spremni da prihvatimo, zbog kojih sam sva u zahvalnosti ovoga jutra, u miru i veri, skoro kao da sam i sama oslobođena svega što je suvišno, bestelesna, lagana duša koja peva u ritmu sunčevih zraka.

Možda je ova kiša isprala u meni brigu, ljutnju, strah… ostavivši me čudu života svežu i obnovljenu, da mu se divim, da ga slavim, da ga istražujem, kao novorođenče koje prvi put otkriva svet, koje prvi put ponovo otkriva ljubav.

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There are days when I wake up grounded, full of strength, totally aware of all the life inside of me and around me. In those times I see things clearer, as if the matter has disperse before me allowing for the essence to reveal the self. I become mindful of the little things that make the living, that mean much more than we are ready to acknowledge, for which I am full of gratitude this morning, in peace and faith, almost as if I am released from all that is redundant, just this incorporeal, airy soul that’s singing in the rhythm of the sunbeams.

Could be this rain has washed away all worry, anger, fear in me… leaving me to the miracle of life fresh and renewed, to admire it, to celebrate it, to explore it, like a newborn revealing the world for the first time, for the first time revealing the love again.

Staze kojima idemo sami / Paths on which we walk alone

Želim da podelim sa vama jednu priču. Napisala ju je žena kojoj se divim i koja mi je postala uzor. Osim njenih tekstova i onoga što piše o njoj kao autoru više knjiga, ne znam mnogo o toj ženi i njenom životu, ali ono što znam je da piše dušom i otvorenim srcem, a to je već dovoljno za prepoznavanje. Još su mudri latini rekli: “Slično se sličnom raduje”. (lat. Similis Simili Gaudet.)

“Gledala sam u sunce večeras. U blizini je stajao mladić. Potom smo zajedno krenuli svako svojoj kući. U tih nekoliko minuta dok se nismo oprostili, vrlo smireno, učtivo i pametno mi je govorio o svojim iskustvima sa Suncem. Rekao je i da se skriva od rođaka kad posmatra Sunce, jer mu je tetka rekla da je sektaš! Smejali smo se toj proceni, mada nije smešno. Ljudi koji se bave sobom drugima izgledaju čudno i sumnjivo. Dugo već gledamo tuđ tanjir, postelju i dvorište, pa smo zaboravili da gledajući u Sunce osvetlimo preostale tamne ćoškove naših duša…”[1]

Photo by luizclas on Pexels.com

Tako uglavnom biva, ljudi osuđuju ili zaziru od onoga što ne razumeju. Moja porodica je prihvatila da je moj put malo drugačiji od uobičajenog, ali tek kada su videli dobrobiti svega toga “čudnog” u mom životu. Ipak, još uvek čujem, čak i od najbližih – šta će ti to?

Teško je kada naiđete na nerazumevanje ljudi do kojih vam je stalo i koji su sastavni deo vašeg života. Ono što sam shvatila je da svako od nas ima svoj put, mi možemo svojim primerom da osvetlimo ponešto u životu svojih bližnjih i da ih podstaknemo na promenu, ali je izbor njihov. Ne možemo, a ja bih rekla da i ne smemo, živeti tuđe živote, a još manje na silu pomagati bilo kome, pa i najrođenijem. Ono što možemo da uradimo, mi koji radimo na sebi, jeste da razumemo, prihvatimo i oprostimo.

Baš kao što nas zove naše srce da tragamo, da učimo, da iskusimo nešto više od utvrđenog puta većine i mi ne možemo da napustimo taj put, jer bi to značilo izdaju sopstvene duše i propadanje našeg tela, tako ni svi ljudi ne mogu osećati, razmišljati i funkcionisati kroz život na isti način kao mi.

Mene je razmišljanje na ovu temu dovelo do zaključka da, sa jedne strane, postoje ljudi koji imaju urođene sisteme za rešavanje problema i samoodbranu i opstanak, koji im pomažu da se brzo i lako izbore sa životnim izazovima i pred nekim teškim situacijama i padovima, brzo povrate svoj mir, zdravlje, sreću… Njima zaista joga, reiki, theta healing, meditacije, esencijalna ulja, BARS, EFT, NLP, energetska psihologija, kvantna medicina i razne druge tehnike i metode deluju čudno i sumnjivo, jer oni postižu rezultate potpuno instinktivno, podsvesno, spontano i ne znajući da ustvari primenjuju mudrosti, znanja i principe koji su utkani u svaku od ovih tehnika. I normalno je da oni pitaju nekoga ko meditira: “Šta će ti to?”.

Sa druge strane, mnogi ljudi nisu voljni da se menjaju, a rad na sebi to zahteva. Mnogi prebacuju odgovornost za svoj život na druge i omalovažavaju sve što nije opšteprihvaćeno. Od lekara traže zdravlje, od sveštenika duhovni mir, od okoline saosećanje i zarobljeni su u začaranom krugu žrtve-dželata i spasioca koji je izvan njih samih, a osuđuju svakoga ko preuzme odgovornost za svoj život i traži način da pomogne sebi služeći se tzv. alternativnim metodama. Ima i onih ljudi koji će otići na jogu, kod travara, na sto i jednu edukaciju, isprobati sve tehnike tražeći rešenje za svoju boljku, ali neće prstom mrdnuti da promene suštinski sve što je neophodno promeniti u svom životu da bi iscelili tu svoju boljku, i onda će reći: “ Sve sam probala, bila sam i kod ovoga i kod onoga i ništa od toga mi nije pomoglo, to je sve šarena laža!”.

Nije suština u metodama i tehnikama, suština je u nama. Kada se uskladimo sa sobom i svojom dušom, svaka metoda će raditi za nas. Stvar je u tome da prestanemo da osuđujemo i počnemo da razumemo. Svi smo jedinstveni i svako ima svoj put, ako u svojoj najbližoj sredini ne nađete saputnike na tom putovanju, potražite ih negde drugde, ne morate koračati sami, ali možete ako je to vaš izbor.


[1] Priča „Svetlo“ iz knjige – Ne bih ovo mogla bez tebe, Brankica Damjanović, Beograd 2016, Skalarbooks.

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I want to share one story with you. It was written by a woman I admire and who has become my role model. Aside from her texts and what she writes about her as the author of multiple books, I don’t know much about that woman and her life, but what I do know is that she writes with a soul and from an open heart, and that’s enough for recognition. Even wise Latins said, “Similar rejoices to similar.” (lat. Similis Simili Gaudet.)

“I was looking at the sun tonight. A young man was standing nearby. Then we each went to each other’s home. In those few minutes until we said goodbye, he spoke to me very calmly, politely and cleverly about his experiences with the Sun. He also said that he was hiding from his relatives when he was watching the Sun, because his aunt told him that he was a sectarian! We laughed at that assessment, although it’s not funny. People who work on themselves to others look strange and suspicious. We have been looking at someone else’s plate, bed and yard for a long time, so we forgot to look at the Sun to illuminate the remaining dark corners of our souls… ”[i]

This is mostly the case people condemn or shy away from what they do not understand. My family accepted that my path was a little different than usual, but only when they saw the benefits of all that “weird” in my life. However, I still hear, even from those closest to me, what do you need that for?

It’s hard when you come across a misunderstanding of the people you care about and who are an integral part of your life. What I realized is that each of us has its own path, we can illuminate something in the lives of our loved ones by our example and encourage them to change, but the choice is theirs. We can’t, and I would say we must not, live other people’s lives, let alone help anyone by force, even our own blood. What we can do, we who work on ourselves, is to understand, accept and forgive.

Just as our heart calls us to seek, to learn, to experience something more than the established path of the majority, and we cannot leave that path, because that would mean betrayal of our own soul and the decay of our body, so not all people can feel, think and function through life in the same way as we do.

Thinking about this topic led me to the conclusion that, on the one hand, there are people who have innate systems for problem solving and self-defense and survival, which help them to quickly and easily cope with life’s challenges and in the face of some difficult situations and falls, quickly regain their peace, health, happiness… Yoga, reiki, theta healing, meditations, essential oils, BARS, EFT, NLP, energy psychology, quantum medicine and various other techniques and methods seem strange and suspicious to them, because they achieve results completely instinctively, subconsciously, spontaneously and not knowing that they are actually applying the wisdom, knowledge and principles that are woven into each of these techniques. And it is normal for them to ask someone who is meditating: “What do you need that for?”.

On the other hand, many people are not willing to change, and working on yourself requires it. Many shift the responsibility for their lives to others and derogate everything that is not generally accepted. They demand health from doctors, spiritual peace from priests, compassion from their surroundings and they are trapped in a vicious circle of victim-executioner and savior who is outside of themselves, and they condemn anyone who takes responsibility for their lives and seeks a way to help themselves by using the so-called alternative methods. There are also those people who will go to yoga, to herbalists, to a hundred and one education, try all the techniques looking for a solution to their pain, but they will not move a finger to change essentially everything that needs to be changed in their life to be able to heal the pain, and then they will say: “I tried everything, I was with this and that and none of that helped me, it’s all a colorful lie!”.

The essence is not in methods and techniques, the essence is in us. When we align with ourselves and our soul, each method will work for us. The point is to stop judging and start understanding. We are all unique and everyone has their own path, if you do not find companions on that journey in your immediate environment, look for them somewhere else, you do not have to walk alone, but you can if it is your choice.

Tijana Stupljanin


[i] The story “Light” from the book – I could not do this without you, Brankica Damjanović, Belgrade 2016, Skalarbooks.

Nešto za razmišljanje / Something to think about

“Greške su deo nas samih, kada prestanemo da grešimo znači da smo mrtvi. Život je samo vreme ispunjeno običnim trenucima sitne sreće.” – Iz filma “Sreća je u malim stvarima” (Momenti di trascurabile felicità (2019)) Daniela Luketija

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“Mistakes are part of ourselves, when we stop making mistakes it means we are dead. Life is just a time filled with moments of ordinary happiness.” – From the movie “Ordinary Happiness” (Momenti di trascurabile felicità (2019)) from Daniele Luchetti

~My religion consists of a humble admiration of the illimitable superior spirit who reveals himself in the slight details we are able to perceive with our frail and feeble mind.~

~Most people say that it is the intellect which makes a great scientist. They are wrong: it is a character.~

~Look deep into nature, and then you will understand everything better.~

~Learn from yesterday, live for today, hope for tomorrow. The important thing is not to stop questioning.~

~It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has exceeded our humanity.~

~Imagination is everything. It is the preview of life’s coming attractions.~

~Intellectuals solve problems, geniuses prevent them.~

~Gravitation is not responsible for people falling in love.~

~A question that sometimes drives me hazy: am I or are the others crazy?~

Albert Einstein

In the depths of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer. – Albert Camus / U dubini zime, konačno sam saznao da je u meni ležalo nepobedivo leto. – Albert Kami

You’ve always had the power my dear, you just had to learn it for yourself. – Glinda, “Wizard of Oz” / Uvek si imala moć draga moja, samo si to morala naučiti. – Glinda, “Čarobnjak iz Oza”

Nothing can dim the light that shines from within. – Maya Angelou / Ništa ne može prigušiti svetlost koja sjaji iznutra. – Maja Anđelo

And you were just like the moon, so lonely, so full of imperfections. But just like the moon, you shined in times of darkness. – C. W. / A ti si bila poput meseca, tako usamljena, tako puna nesavršenosti. Ali baš kao i mesec, svetlela si u trenucima tame. – C. V.

And one day she discovered that she was fierce, and strong, and full of fire, and that not even she could hold herself back because her passion burned brighter than her fears. – Mark Anthony / I jednog dana je otkrila da je žestoka, snažna i puna vatre, te da se ni sama ne može suzdržati jer je njena strast gorela jače od straha. – Mark Antoni

You were wild once. Don’t let them tame you. – Isadora Duncan / Jednom si bila divlja. Ne daj da te ukrote – Isidora Dankan

It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are. – E.E. Cummings / Potrebna je hrabrost da odrastete i postanete ono što zaista jeste. – E. E. Kamings

As I began to love myself. I found that anguish and emotional suffering are only warning signs that I was living my own truth. Today I know this is authenticity. – Charlie Chaplin / Kako sam počeo da volim sebe. Otkrio sam da su teskoba i emocionalna patnja samo upozoravajući znakovi da živim svoju istinu. Danas znam da je ovo autentičnost. – Čarli Čaplin