In the depths of winter, I finally learned that within me there lay an invincible summer. – Albert Camus / U dubini zime, konačno sam saznao da je u meni ležalo nepobedivo leto. – Albert Kami

You’ve always had the power my dear, you just had to learn it for yourself. – Glinda, “Wizard of Oz” / Uvek si imala moć draga moja, samo si to morala naučiti. – Glinda, “Čarobnjak iz Oza”

Nothing can dim the light that shines from within. – Maya Angelou / Ništa ne može prigušiti svetlost koja sjaji iznutra. – Maja Anđelo

And you were just like the moon, so lonely, so full of imperfections. But just like the moon, you shined in times of darkness. – C. W. / A ti si bila poput meseca, tako usamljena, tako puna nesavršenosti. Ali baš kao i mesec, svetlela si u trenucima tame. – C. V.

And one day she discovered that she was fierce, and strong, and full of fire, and that not even she could hold herself back because her passion burned brighter than her fears. – Mark Anthony / I jednog dana je otkrila da je žestoka, snažna i puna vatre, te da se ni sama ne može suzdržati jer je njena strast gorela jače od straha. – Mark Antoni

You were wild once. Don’t let them tame you. – Isadora Duncan / Jednom si bila divlja. Ne daj da te ukrote – Isidora Dankan

It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are. – E.E. Cummings / Potrebna je hrabrost da odrastete i postanete ono što zaista jeste. – E. E. Kamings

As I began to love myself. I found that anguish and emotional suffering are only warning signs that I was living my own truth. Today I know this is authenticity. – Charlie Chaplin / Kako sam počeo da volim sebe. Otkrio sam da su teskoba i emocionalna patnja samo upozoravajući znakovi da živim svoju istinu. Danas znam da je ovo autentičnost. – Čarli Čaplin

Čarolija / Magic

From silence to silence. The light is emerging from the blue clouds. From my cozy nights into a doubt-colored dawn. From the depths of my being, through the gloaming darkness and fear, rises a new, blossomed, flaming, playful and singing enchantress woman, half goddess – half warrior, sometimes a fairy, or a witch.

Man vs. Nature / Čovek protiv prirode

Since the beginning of time, the man had to face the forces of nature to ensure his own survival. The nature has been observed as hostile, the man had to fight with his body and mind to concur the nature and make it his servant. However, more than once, the nature has demonstrated how powerful and wild it can truly be and the man, with all his science and technology and progress, stood no chance. Nevertheless, the mankind survived, there are more people in the world today than ever before.

If you start to think about this, it becomes clear, there is no man vs. nature, the nature is within a man, and the man is within the nature, we do not exist apart from it. If we fight the nature within, then we fight against our own bodies, our own instincts, senses… And if we fight the nature around us, we inevitably lose, because we are just a small piece of it. How about if we stop fighting and start listening, begin working together, cooperating, learn from it as much as we can and then co-create, play with it. This is the abundant planet, there is enough food, clothes and homes for each and every one of us. Nature is greater than all of us together, she gave a birth to everything that exists, we call it a Mother for a reason. She gave us everything she had so that we would live a happy life, as every mother would, and she did it with love.

And how do you treat your mother? Do you show her respect? Are you thankful for her gifts? How do you show your love?

If you do not understand your nature, that is within you and all around you, then you cannot appreciate it and you wouldn’t know how to love yourself or the world around you. Even that’s o.k., mother is forgiving and compassionate, her own love is enough, but you better show her respect! Because the Earth will survive without us, but where would we be without the Earth?

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Od početka vremena čovek je morao da se suočava sa prirodnim silama kako bi obezbedio svoj opstanak. Na prirodu se gledalo kao na neprijatelja, čovek je morao da se bori i umom i telom kako bi je pokorio i potčinio je svojim potrebama. Međutim, više puta je priroda demonstrirala koliko moćna i neukrotiva zaista može biti i čovek, sa svim svojim naučnim dostignućima i tehnologijama i napretkom, nije imao nikakve šanse. Ipak, čovečanstvo je preživelo i danas ima više ljudi na svetu nego ikada pre.

Ako se zamislimo nad ovim, postaje jasno da čovek ne može protiv prirode, jer priroda je u čoveku i čovek je u prirodi, mi ne postojimo odvojeno od nje. Ako se opiremo prirodu u nama, onda se borimo sa našim telima, sopstvenim nagonima, čulima… A ukoliko se borimo sa prirodom oko nas, neminovno gubimo, jer smo mi samo mali njen deo. Kako bi bilo kada bismo prestali da se borimo a počeli da slušamo, da sarađujemo, da učimo od nje što više i onda da stvaramo zajedno, da se igramo. Ovo je planeta obilja, ima dovoljno hrane za sve, odeće i krova nad glavom za baš svakoga od nas. Priroda je veća od svih nas zajedno, ona je rodila sve što postoji, ne zovemo je uzalud Majka Priroda. Dala nam je sve što je imala kako bismo živeli srećno, baš kao prava majka, i to je uradila sa ljubavlju.

A kako se mi ponašamo prema svojoj majci? Da li joj ukazujemo poštovanje? Da li smo zahvalni na njenim darovima? Kako joj pokazujemo ljubav?

Ukoliko ne razumeš svoju prirodu, onu koja je u tebi i onu koja te okružuje, onda je nećeš ni ceniti i nećeš umeti da voliš ni sebe ni svet oko sebe. Čak je i to u redu, jer majka je puna saosećanja i opraštanja, njena sopstvena ljubav joj je dovoljna, ali bolje bi ti bilo da je poštuješ! Jer Zemlja će nastaviti da postoji i bez nas, a gde bismo mi bili bez nje?

Tijana

Koliko vredim? / What is my worth?

Onoliko koliko volite sebe – tolika je vaša cena – i život poštuje tu cenu.

–  Miguel Ruiz, Moć Ljubavi

How much you love yourself – such is your price – and life respects that price.

– Miguel Ruiz, The Mastery of Love: A Practical Guide to the Art of Relationship –Toltec Wisdom Book

Da li znate priču o žabici koja je pobedila u trci i jedina stigla do cilja? (The Frogs’ Race by Dulce Rodrigues) Priča ide otprilike ovako: u šumi je bila organizovana trka, žabica koja uspe da se prva popne na visoki toranj je pobednik. Trka je počela, međutim publika je, umesto da bodri takmičare, poput nekog starog mrzovoljnog žapca, počela da dovikuje – žabe ne mogu da se penju, nikada nećete uspeti, spore ste, to je nemoguće, šta zamišljate ko ste i slična omalovažavanja. Polako su jedna po jedna žabica odustajale i napuštale trku. Na kraju je ostala samo jedna žabica koja se uopšte nije osvrtala već je hrabro išla napred. Kada se popela na vrh i stigla na cilj okrenula se i shvatila da je pobedila, bila je presrećna i zadovoljna, mada malo tužna što ni jedna druga žabica nije stigla na cilj. Svi su se pitali po čemu je posebna baš ta žabica, da bi shvatili da je ona gluva i da nije čula negativne povike i obeshrabrivanje iz publike, već je slušala samo svoj unutrašnji glas koji ju je konstantno bodrio!

Čovek je društveno biće, od kada se rodimo usmereni smo na druge ljude. Dete svet otkriva kroz svoj odnos sa majkom pre svega, pa onda i sa ocem, najbližom porodicom, zatim sa vršnjacima, učiteljima, nastavnicima, komšijama i svim ljudima koje u životu, makar i na kratko, sreće. Svi znamo iz sopstvenog iskustva koliko nam znači pohvala, razumevanje, neko da nas sasluša, neko da nas samo zagrli, neko ko nam je u bilo kojoj sferi autoritet da nam da potvrdu da smo nešto dobro uradili… A šta kada sve to izostane?

Da li nas je iko učio kako da budemo uvek svesni svoje vrednosti i kako da sebi budemo najveća podrška? Često se dogodi u životu da roditelji, koliko god dobri i dobronamerni bili, našem vaspitavanju prilaze iz sopstvenih ograničenja, negativnih iskustava, strahova, pa i iz neznanja. Sigurno ima i onih koji se rode sa neverovatnim samopouzdanjem i verom u sebe i sopstvenu veličinu, kao i onih koje roditelji, ili neki drugi autoritet, uspeju da zadoje ovim vrednostima, ali verujem da je za većinu nas bilo potrebno mnogo saplitanja, učenja, padanja i ustajanja dok nismo spoznali svoju istinsku vrednost i podesili svoj život prema njoj.

Slušala sam nedavno govor Arnolda Švarcenegera u kome je govorio o uspehu. Fasciniralo me je to što su njemu u uspehu u stvari pomogle baš one osobine koje su svi isticali kao njegove mane. I šta bi sa njim bilo da je umesto sebe poslušao sve te druge koji su mu govorili da neće uspeti zbog jakog austrijskog naglaska, zbog prevelikih mišića, neobičnog imena, itd., a on je od bolešljivog, mršavog dečaka iz siromašnog sela u Austriji postao jedan od najplaćenijih glumaca na svetu i guverner Los Anđelesa! On je imao veliku viziju svog života i naporno je radio da je ostvari, ali čini mi se od svega, da mu je najviše pomoglo to što nije slušao ljude koji su mu govorili da neće uspeti i davali mu, pri tom, vrlo realne razloge zašto neće uspeti! Jedino je bilo važno da on sebe vidi kao Mister Univerzuma, glavnog glumca, guvernera…

Toliko je uspešnih priča svuda oko nas i to najviše tamo gde ih najmanje očekujemo. Ljudi koji dožive povredu i doktori im kažu da više nikada neće hodati samostalno, a oni postanu trkači, gimnastičarka sa veštačkom nogom, milioneri koji su odrastali u bedi, ljudi koji dožive najveću tragediju, a onda tu svoju tragediju pretvore u nešto veće od života, ljude koji prežive nemoguće situacije i one koji urade neviđene stvari… Međutim, isto tako imate ljude kojima su doktori greškom rekli da će umreti za mesec dana i oni zaista umru, iako su u stvari bili zdravi, ili veoma talentovane ljude koji padnu u depresiju ili se okrenu porocima i nikada ne dostignu svoj puni potencijal.

Kada smo deca uče nas da slušamo druge. Ja sam prva koja deci skoro svakodnevno govori koliko je važno da slušaju svoje roditelje, ali ih takođe učim da su oni najbolje od nas dvoje i da imaju potencijal kada porastu da budu bolji i pametniji od nas. Isto tako ih učim da čuju svakoga, ali da uvek procene da li to što čuju od drugih korespondira sa njihovim unutrašnjim glasom. Problem nastaje kada mi zaboravimo svoju vrednost sa kojom dolazimo na ovaj svet i počnemo da se oslanjamo na ono što drugi ljude misle ili govore o nama. Možda će nas drugi i preceniti, ipak je veća verovatnoća da će nas podceniti, ali ni jedna od ove dve varijante neće nas usrećiti. Kao što istinsku sreću možemo jedino pronaći u sebi, duboki mir spoznati iznutra, tako i sopstvenu vrednost moramo osetiti u sebi i onda je podeliti sa svetom, a to ćemo uspeti ako se podsetimo svakodnevno ko smo, povezujući se sa sobom, vraćajući se suštini i osluškujući svoju dušu. Tehnika za to ima danas baš koliko hoćeš! Meni su najdraže: ples slobodnim stilom uz muziku koja me podiže, razgovor sa svojim odrazom u ogledalu, pevanje, crtanje ili slikanje, pisanje, yoga, šetnja, gledanje u prirodu…

Henri Ford je jedan od najuspešnijih ljudi ikada i znao je svoju vrednost, evo šta je on rekao o tome: “Mene ne brine šta drugi misle o meni, zato što znam svoju pravu vrednost. A milijarder sam postao zato što znam s novcem i umem da razlikujem prave vrednosti od lažnih.”

Na kraju, vredimo onoliko koliko smo zadovoljni sobom i koliko uživamo u životu. Ako se nekada dogodi da pokleknete pred životom i niste u stanju da volite sebe, pogledajte u oči onih koje volite i koji vole vas, oslušnite šta će vam reći, oni vide u nama svu našu lepotu i dobrotu i kada nismo u svom najboljem izdanju. Ljubav će nas podsetiti na najlepši mogući način na to ko smo i koliko smo dragoceni.

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Do you know the story of a frog who won the race and was the only one to reach the finish line? (The Frogs’ Race by Dulce Rodrigues) The story goes something like this: a race was organized in the woods, the frog that manages to climb the high tower first is the winner. The race started, but the audience, instead of cheering on the competitors, like an old grumpy frog, started shouting – frogs can’t climb, you will never succeed, you are slow, it is impossible, who do you imagine you are and similar insults. Slowly, one by one, the frogs gave up and left the race. In the end, there was only one frog left, which did not look back at all, but went forward bravely. When she climbed to the top and reached the finish line, she turned around and realized that she had won, she was overjoyed and satisfied, although a little sad that no other frog had reached the finish line. Everyone wondered what made that frog special, and they discovered that she was deaf and that she did not hear negative shouts and discouragement from the audience, but only listened to her inner voice, which constantly encouraged her!

Man is a social being; from the minute we are born we are focused on other people. The child discovers the world through his relationship with his mother first of all, and then with his father, the closest family, then with his peers, caregivers, teachers, neighbors and all the people he meets in life, even for a short time. We all know from our own experience how much praise and understanding means to us, someone to listen to us, someone to just hug us, someone who is our authority in any sphere to confirm that we have done something good… And what if all that is missing?

Has anyone taught us how to always be aware of our values ​​and how to be our greatest support? It often happens in life that parents, no matter how good and well-intention they are, approach our upbringing out of their own limitations, negative experiences, fears, and even out of ignorance. Sure, there are those who are born with incredible self-confidence and faith in themselves and their own greatness, as well as those whose parents, or some other authority, manage to instill these values in them, but I believe that most of us needed a lot of tripping, learning, falling and rising until we realized our true value and adjusted our lives to it.

I recently listened to a speech by Arnold Schwarzenegger in which he spoke about success. I was fascinated by the fact that the very qualities that everyone has pointed out as his shortcomings actually helped him in his success. And what would have happened to him if he had listened to all those others who told him that he would not succeed because of his strong Austrian accent, because of his oversized muscles, his unusual name, etc. Instead he has went from sickly, skinny boy from a poor village in Austria to one of the highest paid actors in the world and the governor of Los Angeles! He had a great vision of his life and worked hard to make it happen, but it seems to me that what helped him the most was that he did not listen to people who told him that he would not succeed and gave him, at the same time, very real reasons why it will not work! The only thing that mattered was that he saw himself as Mr. Universe, the main actor, the governor and fallowed that vision…

There are so many success stories all around us, mostly where we least expect them. People who get injured and doctors tell them that they will never walk on their own again, and they become runners, a gymnast with an artificial leg, millionaires who grew up in misery, people who experience the greatest tragedy, and then turn their tragedy into something bigger than life, people who survive impossible situations and those who do unseen things… However, you also have people who were mistakenly told by doctors that they would die in a month and they do die, even though they were actually healthy, or very talented people who fall into depression or turn to vices and never reach their full potential.

When we are children they teach us to listen to others. I am the first one who tells their children almost every day how important it is to listen to their parents, but I also teach them that they are the best of the two of us and that they have the potential when they grow up to be better and smarter than us. I also teach them to hear everyone, but to always assess whether what they hear from others corresponds to their inner voice. The problem arises when we forget our value with which we come to this world and begin to rely on what other people think or say about us. Maybe others will overestimate us, but they are more likely to underestimate us, however neither of these two variants will make us happy. Just as we can only find true happiness in ourselves, know deep peace from within, so we must feel our own value in ourselves and then share it with the world, and we will succeed if we remind ourselves every day who we are, connecting with ourselves, returning to the essence and listening to our soul. There is a plenty of techniques for that today, just as much as you want! My favorites are: freestyle dancing with music that lifts me up, talking to my reflection in the mirror, singing, drawing or painting, writing, yoga, walking (preferably in nature)…

Henry Ford is one of the most successful people ever and he knew his value, here’s what he said about it: “I don’t care what others think of me, because I know my true value. And I became a billionaire because I am knowledgeable with money and I can distinguish true values ​​from false ones.”

We are worth as much as we are satisfied with ourselves and as much as we enjoy life. If you ever happen to kneel before life and you are not able to love yourself, look into the eyes of your loved ones and those who love you, listen to what they will tell you, they see in us all our beauty and goodness even when we are not at our best. Love will remind us in the most beautiful way as possible of who we are and how precious we are.

Život ili smrt / Life or death

Iz perspektive smrti sve ostalo izgleda kao čista lakrdija.

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From a perspective of a death, everything else is just a mockery.

– Horhe Luis Borhes

Bole me sva tvoja čekanja na prozoru

i gledanja na sat

I sva naša neviđanja, isto tako

Važno mi je samo da znaš,

volela sam te neizmerno i tada

kao i sad

I ni jedna razdaljina

ne može to da promeni,

pa ni ova smrt što je napravi

Čekam tebe sada ja

na prozorima moje duše

i nikada vrata ne zatvaram

Sećanja kad navrate,

vrate na kratko sve naše uspomene,

i tugom i srećom me nahrane,

znam da mi ih ti šalješ

na krilima vihora

iz daleka…

Iz daleka…

A ja ti pesmom pozdrave uzvraćam,

ime tvoje dozivam,

kao ti moje što si nekad


Ako ste ikada potpuno iskreno i beskrajno, detinje, voleli nekoga ko više nije među živima, znate da ljubav ne umire smrću tela. Ta ljubav ostaje sa nama i u nama, rekla bih sve do naše smrti, ali nekako slutim da ta ljubav ostaje utkana u našu dušu i živi sa njom doveka.

Srećan je ko ume da voli – kako je to lepo rekao Hese, samo nije to laka sreća! Kada zaista volite nekoga, kao da nemate izbora, volite i sve njegove mane isto koliko i vrline, i volite i kada vas boli neki njegov postupak, čak i kada se taj neko ružno ponese prema vama (ne mislim ovde na bilo koju vrstu zlostavljanja! Tu nema LJ od ljubavi i tačka!). Ljubav tada i zaboli, ali to nas boli naša ljubav koja nosi i veliku odgovornost, jer mi imamo priliku da kroz tu ljubav porastemo, prihvatajući nesavršenost onoga koga volimo, prihvatamo i svoje slabosti i podižemo se na jedan novi nivo u odnosima sa svim ljudima koji su u našim životima. Ako uspemo da prođemo kroz tu bol, a zadržimo ljubav, uradili smo veliku stvar, jer smo tada dali krila toj ljubavi i biću koje volimo, da poleti do visina svoje duše.

Nema boljeg leka od razumevanja i praštanja, a bez ljubavi nema ničega. Smrt ne boli, smrt samo opominje, podučava, podseća da smo sada u ovom trenutku još živi i da imamo mogućnost da biramo kako ćemo živeti. Kada pogledam šta ljudi na samrti kažu o životu, zaključujem, ono što moja duša već zna, da život bez ljubavi prema sebi i ljubavi prema ljudima oko sebe, nema mnogo smisla. Ne morate imati muža ili decu, da biste živeli smisleno, volite to što imate, budite dobri prema sebi, svojim roditeljima, sestrama, braći, prijateljima, ako nemate ni njih, volite svoje komšije, svoje ljubimce, ljude koje srećete na ulici, prodavačice, ako vam je i to teško, volite svoja dela, svoj posao, uložite svu svoju ljubav u nešto što će se utkati u nečiju dušu i nastaviti da živi i kad vas više ne bude.

Za mene je samo ljubav smisao života, a koliko ćemo ljubavi imati u životu zavisi samo od nas. Da, ja sam srećna jer umem da volim, ali da mi je uvek lako, nije, nekada zaboravim da dam sebi malo te podrške i ljubavi, nekada uradim nešto što me razočara i zaboli, nekada čekam da mi je neko drugi pruži, samo to ne funkcioniše tako. Ako ne volimo sebe onom beskrajnom, detinjom ljubavlju sa početka priče, nećemo prepoznati ili nećemo ceniti ni ljubav koju nam drugi daju. I još nešto, ako ne negujemo ljubav prema sebi, nećemo imati dovoljno ljubavi kojom ćemo razumeti, podržavati i praštati onima koji našoj ljubavi/životu daju smisao.

P.S. Volim te

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All yours waiting at the window hurts me,
looking at the clock too
And all the time we didn’t spent together, as well
It is important to me for you to know just this,
I loved you indefinitely then
as I do now
And there is no distance
that can change this,
not even the one death had made
Now I wait for you
at the windows of my soul
and I never close the door
When memories burst in,
bringing back for a moment all our reminiscences,
filling me with sadness and with happiness,
I know you are sending them my way
on the whirlwind’s wings
from far away…
From far away…
And I salute you in return with this song,
and I shout out your name,
as you once shouted mine


If you had ever completely true and infinitely, childlike, loved someone who is no longer among living, you know that love does not die with the body. That love stays with us and within us until we die, I would say, but somehow I sense that this love stays woven into our soul and lives with it forever.

Happy is the one who can love – as beautifully said by Hesse, however, it is not easy luck! When you really love someone, as if you don’t have a choice, you love all his downsides as much as his virtues and you love him even if you are hurt by some of his actions, even when that someone has mistreated you (just to be clear, I do not talk here about any kind of abuse! Where there is abuse, there is no mention of love, period!). When that happens, love hurts, but what hurts is our own love that carries a big responsibility, because we have the opportunity to grow through this love, by accepting the imperfections of our loved one, we also accept our own weaknesses and we rise up to a new level of relationship with all the people in our lives. If we manage to pass through that pain and keep the love, we have done a great thing, because then we gave wings to that love and to that someone we love, so he can fly to the heights of his soul.

There is no better remedy than understanding and forgiving, and without love, there is nothing. Death does not hurt, death warns, teaches, reminds that we are now, at this moment still alive and that we have the possibility to choose how we are going to live. When I see what people at their deathbed are saying about life, I conclude – what my soul already knows, that life without love for the self and for the people around, has very little sense. You don’t have to have a husband or kids to have a meaningful life, you can love what you have, be good to yourself, your parents, sisters, brothers, friends, and if you don’t have any of those people, love your neighbors, your pets, people you meet on the street, a saleswoman, if that’s too hard for you, love your deeds, your work, invest all your love in something that will touch someone’s soul and continue to live even when you are gone.

To me, love is the only purpose of life, and how much love will we have in life depends solely on us. Yes, I am happy because I know how to love, however it does not come always easy, sometimes I forget to give to myself a bit of that support and love, sometimes I do something that disappoints and hurts me, at times I wait for someone to give me that love, only it doesn’t work that way. If we don’t love ourselves with that infinite, childlike love from the beginning of this story, we will never recognize or appreciate the love somebody else is giving to us. And one more thing, if we don’t cherish self-love, we will not have enough love to understand, support and forgive to those who give our love/life a purpose.

P.S. I love you

Samo budi to što jesi / Just be who you are

Budi svoja! Toliko si bitna, neponovljiva, neprocenjiva! Zašto nam je toliko teško da u to poverujemo? Osećam koliko darova sam primila, samim rođenjem, samim postankom. Iskra tvorca je u svima nama, a šta mi radimo sa njom? Upoređujemo se sa drugima, imitiramo, kopiramo, slušamo druge da bismo bili prihvaćeni, da bismo bili dobri roditeljima, komšijama, prijateljima, rodbini, učiteljici, mužu, koleginici, šefu… svima samo ne sebi!

Dugo već imam potrebu da napišem tekst na temu autentičnosti, ali nisam znala kako. Prepoznala sam koliko je važno da budemo svoji, da komuniciramo sa sobom, da čujemo sebe, iskažemo sebe i ispoštujemo sebe, jer je to jedini način da budemo istinski ispunjeni i srećni. Umela sam da prepoznam autentičnost kod drugih ljudi i divila sam se tome kad neko samo jeste ono što jeste i radi ono što voli, bez laži, usiljenosti i potrebe da bilo šta dokaže bilo kome. Jer kada živiš ono što jesi, tebe stvarno ne interesuje šta će neko da misli o tome šta imaš da kažeš ili da li se nekome sviđa ili ne sviđa to što radiš. Jer kada živimo i radimo podržavajući svoju autentičnost mi smo srećni i zadovoljni, ispunjavamo svoju svrhu samim tim što jesmo i to je naša nagrada. Korist od toga je višestruka jer se naša ispunjenost životom koji volimo i na kome smo zahvalni preliva i na druge ljude i daje im zeleno svetlo da se otvore za tu mogućnost da je istinska sreća tako jednostavna, toliko obična da je često zanemarujemo, odbacujemo kao suviše očiglednu.

Čiji život živimo? Šta je zaista važno u životu?

Bez obzira na to što sam svesna koliko je važno živeti autentično i u skladu sa svojim bićem, moram da priznam da nisam još uvek uspela u tome. Pitam se često ko sam uistinu ja i šta je to što ja zaista želim? Toliko dugo sam živela iz glave, iz uverenja svojih roditelja i okoline, da više nisam sigurna gde leži moja autentičnost. Koja je korist od toga da živimo život za koji će nam drugi reći – vidi kako si uspešna, vidi kako si srećna, vidi kako si dobra, blago tebi, a mi ne osećamo taj uspeh, tu sreću i tu dobrotu. Šta bi se dogodilo kada bismo živeli život od koga bi nam treperelo celo biće i osmeh ne bi silazio sa našeg lica, iako bi možda drugi govorili, ti si luda, to je nemoguće, u kom svetu ti živiš, to je glupo i slično?

Šta bi se dogodilo kada bismo dopustili sebi da budemo to što jesmo? Čudo prirode, radost života, svetlost koju ništa ne može pomračiti?

Da li bi svet i život kakve poznajemo danas uopšte postojali da nije bilo onih “ludih” autentičnih ljudi koji su živeli život po svojim aršinima, često usamljeni, često odbačeni, često nipodaštavani, proganjani, neshvaćeni? Koliko njih je, svesni večnosti, stavljalo svoj ovozemaljski život na vešala, giljotine, lomače, odbijajući da žive lažne živote, nemajući ništa drugo da ponude zajednici koja ih ne shvata i odbacuje do svoje autentičnosti!

A šta je to autentičnost? U jezičkom smislu, termin autentičan potekao je od grčke reči authentikos, što znači istinitost, pravovaljanost, verodostojnost. Ako znamo da na ovom svetu ne postoje dve apsolutno iste jedinke u biljnom i životinjskom svetu, pa i šire (npr. ne postoje dve identične pahulje snega!), kao i da je svaki čovek jedinstven po mnogim karakteristikama (dnk, otisak prsta, zenica oka…), zar je teško prihvatiti da su te “različitosti” važne?

Koja je moja istina koju sam došla da živim? Možda moje želje i moja vizija života samo meni ima smisla, možda još nisam otkrila kako da živim svoju autentičnost, možda će me neko proglasiti ludom što čeprkam po svom savršenom životu tragajući za nekom autentičnošću koja će me odvesti ko zna gde? A možda je sve to nebitno, možda je dovoljno da sam ja srećna i zadovoljna i odana autentičnoj sebi?

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Be yourself! You are so important, unique, priceless! Why is it so hard for us to believe in this? I feel the magnitude of gifts that I have received with birth, with the origin itself. The spark of the creator is in all of us, but what do we do with it? We compare ourselves to others, we copy, we listen to others in order to be accepted, to be good for our parents, for our neighbors, friends, relatives, teacher, for our husband, colleague, our boss, for everyone except for ourselves!

I have this urge, for a while now, to write about authenticity, but I didn’t know where to start. I realized how important it is to be genuine, to communicate with myself, to hear myself, to express myself and to honor myself, because it is the only way to truly be fulfilled and happy. I knew how to recognize the authenticity in others and I admired how some people could just be who they are and do the things they love, without the lie, pretentiousness and need to prove anything to anyone. For when you live in line with who you are, you really don’t care what will other people think about what you have to say or whether someone likes or dislikes what you do. Because when our life and work support our authenticity, we are happy and satisfied, we fulfill our purpose simply by being ourselves, and that is our reward. The benefits from this is multiple, since our fulfillment with life, that we love and are thankful for, overflows on to other people and gives them a green light to open up to the possibility that true happiness is so simple, so ordinary that we too often disregard it, we discard it as too obvious.

Whose life do we live? What is really important in life?

Regardless of that me being conscious about how much authentic living and being in the harmony with your own self really matters, I have to admit that I haven’t yet succeeded in that. I often wonder who am I truly and what is it that I really desire? I have lived too long from inside my head, from the belief of my parents and the environment so that I am not sure where my authenticity lies. What is the benefit of living a life for which the others will say – look how successful you are, look how happy you are, look how good you are, good for you, while I don’t feel that success, that happiness and the goodness. What would happen if we would live life from which our entire being would vibrate and smile would never leave our face, although the others might say, you are crazy, it is impossible, in what world are you live in, it is stupid, and so on?

What would happen if we gave ourselves a permission to be who we are? The wonder of nature, the joy of life, the light that nothing can outshine?

Would the world and the life that we know today even exist if it wasn’t for those “crazy” authentic people who lived their lives by their own measure, often lonely, often rejected, frequently underappreciated, prosecuted, misunderstood? How many of them have put their worldly life onto the gallows, guillotines, bonfires, aware of eternity and declining to live fake lives, having nothing else to offer to the community, that don’t understand them and rejects them, except their authenticity!

Tijana

Ko ume da voli, ne bi trebalo ništa drugo da radi.

-Dušan Radović

One who knows how to love, should not be doing anything else.

– Dusan Radovic


No matter where we come from, there is one language we can all speak and understand from birth, the language of the heart, love.

― Imania Margria, Secrets of My Heart

Bez obzira odakle potičemo, postoji jedan jezik koji svi govorimo i razumemo od rođenja, to je jezik srca, ljubav.

– Imania Margria, Tajne moga srca


I love you without knowing how, or when, or from where. I love you simply, without problems or pride: I love you in this way because I do not know any other way of loving but this, in which there is no I or you, so intimate that your hand upon my chest is my hand, so intimate that when I fall asleep your eyes close.

― Pablo Neruda, 100 Love Sonnets

Volim te mada ne znam kako, ili kada, ili odakle. Volim te jednostavno, bez problema ili ponosa: volim te na ovaj način jer ne poznajem ni jedan drugi način na koji bih mogao voleti, u njemu nema mene ili tebe, toliko je intiman da je tvoja ruka na mojim grudima moja ruka, toliko intiman da kada ja zaspim, tvoje se oči zatvore.

– Pablo Neruda, 100 Ljubavnih soneta


Love is that condition in which the happiness of another person is essential to your own.

― Robert A. Heinlein, Stranger in a Strange Land

Ljubav je takvo stanje u kome je sreća druge osobe presudna za tvoju sopstvenu sreću.

– Robert A. Heinlein, Stranac u stranoj zemlji


When we love, we always strive to become better than we are. When we strive to become better than we are, everything around us becomes better too.

― Paulo Coelho, The Alchemist

Kada volimo, mi uvek težimo da postanemo bolji nego što jesmo. Kada se trudimo da postanemo bolji nego što jesmo, i sve oko nas postane bolje.

– Paulo Koeljo, Alhemičar


Valja se dobro osloniti o svoju hrabrost i ljubav, i plave slojeve nade. To vam je najprostiji način da pronađete sebe i domognete se mnogih nesvakidašnjih čuda.

— Miroslav Mika Antić

You should lean hard on your courage and love, and blue layers of hope. It is the simplest way for you to find yourself and reach the plenty of extraordinary wonders.

– Miroslav Mika Antic

Da li brojite svoje godine? / Do you count your years?

Prošlog meseca sam napunila 40 godina. Da li je 40 godina puno ili malo? Ko može na to tačno da odgovori? Ako pitate šestogodišnjaka, rećiće vam da je to previše godina, a ako pitate osamdesetogodišnjaka, on će samo odmahnuti rukom i reći da je to ništa. I stvarno, šta znači broj godina? Šta on određuje? U mnogim društvima kada čovek pređe četrdesetu, otvoreno ili prećutno, smatra se da je već star i da njegov život kreće nizvodnom putanjom. Mislim da je to zastareo i potpuno neopravdan stav, a da ne kažem koliko je štetan! Ja se ne osećam staro, ne izgledam staro, mnogi moji vršnjaci se tek žene i udaju, tek planiraju porodicu, neko tek započinje svoj biznis, iskreno i ja se osećam kao da moj život tek počinje. Sakupila sam svoje greške i uspehe i spremna sam da okrenem novi list.

Neka istraživanja o značenju broja 40 su fascinantna. Postavljaju se pitanja zašto se u pravoslavlju pomen duši daje posle 40 dana, zašto Božićni post traje tačno 40 dana, da li je slučajno Mojsije lutao pustinjom 40 dana, da li je slučajno veliki potop trajao baš 40 dana? Naša poznata književnica Mirjana Đapo, u knjizi „Elysion”[1] pišući o ovom fenomenu, između ostalog, kaže: Uzimajući 40 kao ispunjenje jedne životne faze, Talmud, a kasnije i katolička crkva, označili su ovaj broj kao ’kanonsko doba’ čoveka, što znači da je čovekov intelekt tada najrazvijeniji. Zaista, savremeni psiholozi često uočavaju određene promene u razvoju ličnosti kratko nakon nastanka 40-ih; pogled na biografije poznatih pruža dodatni dokaz za ovakva promišljanja.

Jedna mudrost kaže: neko se rodi star, a neko umre mlad u 101. godini. Za sve u životu postoji pravo vreme, ali se ono ne meri brojem godina. Da li su godine važne? Da, meni jesu, ali ne u onom uobičajenom smislu, sklonija sam da mislim, kao u gore citiranoj rečenici, da su četrdesete važna prekretnica u životu svakog čoveka kada je on spreman da u punoj snazi zasija. Možda je vreme da se neki mostovi spale, možda da se započne nešto potpuno novo, možda da se uvedu neke teške promene, donesu nove odluke, pokrenu neki davno sanjani snovi…

Mislim da je svaka dekada u životu bitna, da nam donosi neke nove izazove, nove uvide. Mi nismo isti sa 11, 25, 30 godina. Menjamo se, sazrevamo, učimo, odrastamo, menjaju se naše želje, naši prioriteti. Jedno je sigurno, čovek u četrdesetim sve teže može da živi po inerciji, ušuškan u laži koje ga žuljaju, žmureći na jedno oko da ne bi poremetio rutinu, ako ništa drugo, ovo je vreme kada i naše telo počne jače da se buni i „tera“ nas da se menjamo. Čini mi se od svega postaje najvažnije kako se zaista osećamo u svojoj koži, u svom životu, a ne kako sve to drugima izgleda.

Na kraju, nekako se vratimo ponovo na početak, prastara mudrost u jednoj rečenici Upoznaj samoga sebe, jer vezu koju gradimo sami sa sobom je temelj svake druge veze i odnosa! Ako uspemo da zaista osetimo svoje telo, poslušamo svoje misli, preispitamo svoje stavove, zavolimo sebe u celosti i prigrlimo glas svoje duše, ne postoji ništa što ne možemo da radimo i sa 55, 67 ili 89 godina. Šta vi mislite o tome? Da li samo brojite svoje godine ili ih živite?

[1] Mirjana Đapo: Elysion: roman. “Arte”, Beograd, 2010.

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Last month I turned 40. Is 40 a lot or not? Who can give a correct answer to that? If you ask a six-year-old, they’ll tell you it is too many years, but if you ask an eighty-years-old, they’ll just shake off their hand and say it’s nothing. And really, what does the number of years mean? What does it determine? In many societies when someone turns 40 it is implied, explicitly or implicitly, that that person is old and that his life is now starting to decline. I think it is outdated and entirely unjustified attitude, not to mention how harmful it is! I do not feel old, I do not look old, many of my peers are just getting married, just starting planning a family, someone is just starting their business, and to be honest I too have a sense that my life is just beginning. I have gathered my mistakes and successes and I am now ready to turn the new page around.

Some researches about the meaning of the number 40 are fascinating. Questions like why in Orthodox Christianity the commemoration to the soul is given 40 days after the death, why the Christmas fasting last for exactly 40 days, is it accidentally that the Moses has wondered through desert for 40 days, did the great flood last for 40 days by chance? Our well-known writer Mirjana Djapo wrote about this phenomenon in her book “Elysion”[i], among other things, she said: Taking 40 as the fulfillment of one stage of life, the Talmud, later the Catholic Church, labeled this number as the ‘canonical age of man’, meaning that man’s intellect is then at its peak. Indeed, modern psychologists often view changes in personality development shortly after turning 40; a look at the biographies of celebrities provides further evidence for such reflections.

A wise man once said: Someone is born old, and someone dies young at 101. In life, there is a right time for everything, only that time is not measured with age. Does age matter? Yes, to me it does matter, but maybe not like in a common sense of it. Similar to the cited sentence above, I am prone to think that forties are an important milestone in every man’s life, when he is ready to shine in his full glory. Maybe now the time has come to burn some old bridges, maybe it’s time to start something entirely new, perhaps some hard changes need to be introduced, some new decisions reached, a long time dreamed dreams should be initiated…

I think that every decade in life is important and that it brings us new challenges, new insights. We are not the same with 11, 25, 30 years. We are changing, developing, maturing, learning, our desires change, our priorities as well. One thing is for sure, man in his 40 can’t no longer live by inertia, tucked into the lies that pock, closing one eye just so you don’t break a routine, if nothing else, this is a time when our bodies start to rebel more “pushing us” to change. Seems like it is becoming more about how I really feel in my own skin, in my life and not how it appears to others.

At the end, we somehow come to the beginning, an ancient wisdom in one sentence: Know thy self, because the relationship that we build with ourselves is the ground stone of every other relationship and commitment! If we can manage truly to feel our bodies, listen to our thoughts, to reconsider our views, love ourselves entirely and embrace the voice of our soul, there is nothing we can’t do even at 55, 67 or 89 years of age. What do you think about that? Do you just count your years or do you live them?

[i] Mirjana Djapo: Elysion: the novel. “Arte”, Belgrade, 2010.

 

“Imagination is more important than knowledge. For knowledge is limited to all we now know and understand, while imagination embraces the entire world, and all there ever will be to know and understand.” ―Albert Einstein

“Mašta je mnogo važnija od znanja. Jer je znanje ograničeno onime što trenutno znamo i razumemo, dok mašta obuhvata ceo svet i sve što će ikada moći da se sazna i razume.” – Albert Anštajn

“You have the power to design a new life for yourself. Forget limiting yourself. Forget being reasonable. Forget being realistic. It is time to use your imagination and pretend that you get to have a better life now, because you do.” ―Daeryl Holzer

“Imate moć da dizajnirate novi život za sebe. Zaboravite na ograničavanje sebe. Zaboravite na razum. Zaboravite na realističnost. Vreme je da koristiti svoju maštu i pretvarajte se da možete imati bolji život sada, zato što možete.” – Deril Holzer

“Imagination is the beginning of creation. You imagine what you desire, you will what you imagine, and at last, you create what you will.” ―George Bernard Shaw

“Mašta je početak kreacije. Zamisliš ono što želiš, zaželiš ono što si zamislio i na kraju stvoriš ono što si želeo.” – Džordž Bernard Šo

“If you fall in love with the imagination, you understand that it is a free spirit. It will go anywhere, and it can do anything.” ―Alice Walker

“Ako se zaljubiš u maštu, onda razumeš da je ona slobodnog duha. Otićiće bilo kuda i može da uradi bilo šta.” – Alisa Voker

“To bring anything into your life, imagine that it’s already there.” ―Richard Bach

“Da bi privukao bilo šta u svoj život, zamisli da ga već imaš.” – Ričard Bah

Umetnost naša nasušna /Art Our Essential

Straight-away the ideas flow in upon me, directly from God, and not only do I see distinct themes in my mind’s eye, but they are clothed in the right forms, harmonies, and orchestration.
—Johannes Brahms

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Ideje se neposredno ulivaju u mene, direktno od Boga, i ne samo da u očima svog uma vidim jasne teme, već su one obučene u prave forme, harmonije i orkestracije.

– Johanes Brams

Umetnost je razgovor duše i Boga. Ona nam prenosi važnu poruku o stvaranju i večnosti. Govori nam, ko ume da čuje, da svi nosimo isti izvor u sebi. Božanska priroda koja stvara, koja ne poznaje granice i nema rok trajanja. To sveto mesto koje nas ispuni kada stvaramo, prenosi se direktno sa duše na dušu. Zato mnogima promakne ta lepota, taj neprocenjivi trenutak čiste emocije koja nas povezuje sa celom Vasionom, sa svim umetnicima pre nas i sa svima onima koji će doći. Kroz umetnost možemo da doživimo, da osetimo beskonačnost.

Umetnost je potreba duše. Ljudi su stvarali umetnost i kada toga nisu bili ni svesni. Izražavanje kroz oblike i boje je dolazilo prirodno, spontano. Taj božanski deo nas je oduvek tražio da se izrazi.

Kao zrela žena počela sam da osećam nešto kao čežnju za kreativnim izrazom. Odjednom me je sve vuklo ka tome da želim da stvaram, tako je i nastao ovaj blog, odjednom me ponovo zanima umetnost u svim formama i oblicima.

Jednoga dana vidim objavu na fejsbuku da jedna slikarka drži časove slikanja, pozovem je i dogovorim sa njom čas za mene i moju ćerku, koja obožava kreativne stvari. Nisam ni znala da umem da nacrtam ceo portret. Od srednje škole se nisam igrala sa crtanjem i slikanjem, a crtala sam nekada puno. Potpuno sam zapustila taj deo sebe, a osećaj kada se “izgubiš” u nekom prostoru u sebi i samo prepustiš stvaranju, je jedna posebna vrsta meditacije i moja duša je presrećna što sam joj dopustila da se igra. A kada je duša srećna, ona onda i slika i igra i peva i ne prestaje da stvara.

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Art is the need of the soul. People were making art when they were not even aware of it. Expression through shapes and colors came naturally, spontaneously. That divine part of our being was always looking to express itself.

As a mature woman, I began to feel something like craving for creative expression. Suddenly everything was pulling me into wanting to create, that’s how this blog came about, all of a sudden I’m rediscovering my interest for art in all forms and shapes.

One day I see a post on Facebook that an artist holds painting classes, I call her and arrange with her an hour class for me and my daughter, who loves creative things. I didn’t even knew that I know how to draw the whole portrait. I have not played with drawing and painting since high school, and I used to draw a lot. I completely abandoned that part of myself, but the feeling of “losing” yourself in some space within and just letting go of creation is one particular kind of meditation and my soul is overjoyed that I let it out to play. And when the soul is happy, then it also paints and plays and sings and does not stop creating.