Staze kojima idemo sami / Paths on which we walk alone

Želim da podelim sa vama jednu priču. Napisala ju je žena kojoj se divim i koja mi je postala uzor. Osim njenih tekstova i onoga što piše o njoj kao autoru više knjiga, ne znam mnogo o toj ženi i njenom životu, ali ono što znam je da piše dušom i otvorenim srcem, a to je već dovoljno za prepoznavanje. Još su mudri latini rekli: “Slično se sličnom raduje”. (lat. Similis Simili Gaudet.)

“Gledala sam u sunce večeras. U blizini je stajao mladić. Potom smo zajedno krenuli svako svojoj kući. U tih nekoliko minuta dok se nismo oprostili, vrlo smireno, učtivo i pametno mi je govorio o svojim iskustvima sa Suncem. Rekao je i da se skriva od rođaka kad posmatra Sunce, jer mu je tetka rekla da je sektaš! Smejali smo se toj proceni, mada nije smešno. Ljudi koji se bave sobom drugima izgledaju čudno i sumnjivo. Dugo već gledamo tuđ tanjir, postelju i dvorište, pa smo zaboravili da gledajući u Sunce osvetlimo preostale tamne ćoškove naših duša…”[1]

Photo by luizclas on Pexels.com

Tako uglavnom biva, ljudi osuđuju ili zaziru od onoga što ne razumeju. Moja porodica je prihvatila da je moj put malo drugačiji od uobičajenog, ali tek kada su videli dobrobiti svega toga “čudnog” u mom životu. Ipak, još uvek čujem, čak i od najbližih – šta će ti to?

Teško je kada naiđete na nerazumevanje ljudi do kojih vam je stalo i koji su sastavni deo vašeg života. Ono što sam shvatila je da svako od nas ima svoj put, mi možemo svojim primerom da osvetlimo ponešto u životu svojih bližnjih i da ih podstaknemo na promenu, ali je izbor njihov. Ne možemo, a ja bih rekla da i ne smemo, živeti tuđe živote, a još manje na silu pomagati bilo kome, pa i najrođenijem. Ono što možemo da uradimo, mi koji radimo na sebi, jeste da razumemo, prihvatimo i oprostimo.

Baš kao što nas zove naše srce da tragamo, da učimo, da iskusimo nešto više od utvrđenog puta većine i mi ne možemo da napustimo taj put, jer bi to značilo izdaju sopstvene duše i propadanje našeg tela, tako ni svi ljudi ne mogu osećati, razmišljati i funkcionisati kroz život na isti način kao mi.

Mene je razmišljanje na ovu temu dovelo do zaključka da, sa jedne strane, postoje ljudi koji imaju urođene sisteme za rešavanje problema i samoodbranu i opstanak, koji im pomažu da se brzo i lako izbore sa životnim izazovima i pred nekim teškim situacijama i padovima, brzo povrate svoj mir, zdravlje, sreću… Njima zaista joga, reiki, theta healing, meditacije, esencijalna ulja, BARS, EFT, NLP, energetska psihologija, kvantna medicina i razne druge tehnike i metode deluju čudno i sumnjivo, jer oni postižu rezultate potpuno instinktivno, podsvesno, spontano i ne znajući da ustvari primenjuju mudrosti, znanja i principe koji su utkani u svaku od ovih tehnika. I normalno je da oni pitaju nekoga ko meditira: “Šta će ti to?”.

Sa druge strane, mnogi ljudi nisu voljni da se menjaju, a rad na sebi to zahteva. Mnogi prebacuju odgovornost za svoj život na druge i omalovažavaju sve što nije opšteprihvaćeno. Od lekara traže zdravlje, od sveštenika duhovni mir, od okoline saosećanje i zarobljeni su u začaranom krugu žrtve-dželata i spasioca koji je izvan njih samih, a osuđuju svakoga ko preuzme odgovornost za svoj život i traži način da pomogne sebi služeći se tzv. alternativnim metodama. Ima i onih ljudi koji će otići na jogu, kod travara, na sto i jednu edukaciju, isprobati sve tehnike tražeći rešenje za svoju boljku, ali neće prstom mrdnuti da promene suštinski sve što je neophodno promeniti u svom životu da bi iscelili tu svoju boljku, i onda će reći: “ Sve sam probala, bila sam i kod ovoga i kod onoga i ništa od toga mi nije pomoglo, to je sve šarena laža!”.

Nije suština u metodama i tehnikama, suština je u nama. Kada se uskladimo sa sobom i svojom dušom, svaka metoda će raditi za nas. Stvar je u tome da prestanemo da osuđujemo i počnemo da razumemo. Svi smo jedinstveni i svako ima svoj put, ako u svojoj najbližoj sredini ne nađete saputnike na tom putovanju, potražite ih negde drugde, ne morate koračati sami, ali možete ako je to vaš izbor.


[1] Priča „Svetlo“ iz knjige – Ne bih ovo mogla bez tebe, Brankica Damjanović, Beograd 2016, Skalarbooks.

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I want to share one story with you. It was written by a woman I admire and who has become my role model. Aside from her texts and what she writes about her as the author of multiple books, I don’t know much about that woman and her life, but what I do know is that she writes with a soul and from an open heart, and that’s enough for recognition. Even wise Latins said, “Similar rejoices to similar.” (lat. Similis Simili Gaudet.)

“I was looking at the sun tonight. A young man was standing nearby. Then we each went to each other’s home. In those few minutes until we said goodbye, he spoke to me very calmly, politely and cleverly about his experiences with the Sun. He also said that he was hiding from his relatives when he was watching the Sun, because his aunt told him that he was a sectarian! We laughed at that assessment, although it’s not funny. People who work on themselves to others look strange and suspicious. We have been looking at someone else’s plate, bed and yard for a long time, so we forgot to look at the Sun to illuminate the remaining dark corners of our souls… ”[i]

This is mostly the case people condemn or shy away from what they do not understand. My family accepted that my path was a little different than usual, but only when they saw the benefits of all that “weird” in my life. However, I still hear, even from those closest to me, what do you need that for?

It’s hard when you come across a misunderstanding of the people you care about and who are an integral part of your life. What I realized is that each of us has its own path, we can illuminate something in the lives of our loved ones by our example and encourage them to change, but the choice is theirs. We can’t, and I would say we must not, live other people’s lives, let alone help anyone by force, even our own blood. What we can do, we who work on ourselves, is to understand, accept and forgive.

Just as our heart calls us to seek, to learn, to experience something more than the established path of the majority, and we cannot leave that path, because that would mean betrayal of our own soul and the decay of our body, so not all people can feel, think and function through life in the same way as we do.

Thinking about this topic led me to the conclusion that, on the one hand, there are people who have innate systems for problem solving and self-defense and survival, which help them to quickly and easily cope with life’s challenges and in the face of some difficult situations and falls, quickly regain their peace, health, happiness… Yoga, reiki, theta healing, meditations, essential oils, BARS, EFT, NLP, energy psychology, quantum medicine and various other techniques and methods seem strange and suspicious to them, because they achieve results completely instinctively, subconsciously, spontaneously and not knowing that they are actually applying the wisdom, knowledge and principles that are woven into each of these techniques. And it is normal for them to ask someone who is meditating: “What do you need that for?”.

On the other hand, many people are not willing to change, and working on yourself requires it. Many shift the responsibility for their lives to others and derogate everything that is not generally accepted. They demand health from doctors, spiritual peace from priests, compassion from their surroundings and they are trapped in a vicious circle of victim-executioner and savior who is outside of themselves, and they condemn anyone who takes responsibility for their lives and seeks a way to help themselves by using the so-called alternative methods. There are also those people who will go to yoga, to herbalists, to a hundred and one education, try all the techniques looking for a solution to their pain, but they will not move a finger to change essentially everything that needs to be changed in their life to be able to heal the pain, and then they will say: “I tried everything, I was with this and that and none of that helped me, it’s all a colorful lie!”.

The essence is not in methods and techniques, the essence is in us. When we align with ourselves and our soul, each method will work for us. The point is to stop judging and start understanding. We are all unique and everyone has their own path, if you do not find companions on that journey in your immediate environment, look for them somewhere else, you do not have to walk alone, but you can if it is your choice.

Tijana Stupljanin


[i] The story “Light” from the book – I could not do this without you, Brankica Damjanović, Belgrade 2016, Skalarbooks.

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